swirls_twirls

the only one that's got enough of me to break my heart.

i knew i was going to get hurt yet i tried. i had to. i had to take that one chance to see if i'd make a place in your heart. but at least i did. the sad part is i had the place called "your new found friend."
i guess it will just stay that way. never changing, never will. but it was worth the take. worth the pain. worth my everything.

never had, never has, never will have.

happy birthday maffi! sorry i didn't get the chance to greet you in person:)
happy, happy birthday! hope you had a great one>:D

paano ba maiiwasang mahulog sa'yo?
paano ba magiging tayo?
paano ba magkaroon ng puwang sa puso mo?
paano ba magmahal na hindi ako yung natatalo?

paano nga ba?
panno kung may iba na tayong dalawa?
paano kung ako lang ang nakakaramdam?
paano mo nahahayaang ako'y masaktan?

what more do you want from me? you're so annoying! i can't find my fucking clothes!! why?? tae talaga!! i have not even gone out lately and yet i have no clothes!! one thing i hate is when people get my things without asking permission. and puta talaga!

let's bury our memories of you and i singing under the stars</3

why boy are you so heart broken? can i be the one to mend that broken heart of yours?
well at least just let me in?:-<

today seems to be the happiest day of this week. i was able to accomplish all that i had to do. i finished three cards today and i barely even did them at home:)) we were able to finish the boards for csdc. i was able to get an E for my filipino prayer orals\:D/ life's good, life's good! i also saw my friend from ICA who i have not seen for four years already! how i miss my old life! i miss ballet. i just miss all the things i've had before. i never even realized they never left me. i just kept rejecting the things that could've made me happy. i should've been more determined. i should've never given up. but oh well, life goes on. i just have to make the most out of it. and for you. i have no idea...maybe thank you for making me realize just how great my life is when came into it. it's been awesome and we'll keep getting stronger. i'll keep moving on for the best:) and for you and me:">

One night the moon whispered to her,

"If he makes you cry why don't you just leave him?"

She looked up and asked,

"Moon, would you ever leave your sky?"

Ana Blanquita you make me sad:-<

eating sponge while making the powerpoint presentation for THE. with maffi, ana, apple and karen. pwedeng mag-absent na lang kaming lahat bukas?:)) hahaha! wala nang magprepresent ng presentation but maia=)) love you girl>:D<  we're adding vivaldi's four seasons our presentation:)) ang haba-haba! i have to finish my lab report pa!

you might not know how much you mean to me
because friends is what we'll ever be
but i hope you knew i've tried
and now these feelings i can't hide

i wish we're back to the good old days
when you and i are just familiar faces
the moments our worlds never collide
back when our feelings were put aside

i also wish i could turn back time
back when my world was only  mine
in my past when i couldn't care less that you  existed
but now in my mind you're the only one inflicted

maybe you never saw this coming
but to tell you the truth, they just came slamming
i woke up one day thinking of you
i just can't believe my feelings are true

my heart that once had it's only love
but you came down lost from up above
so darling help me ease the pain
of letting you go and erasing this stain

it's beautiful, wonderful don't you ever change.

sometimes i can't help but think why you try to constantly avoid me. but tell me why you're so different when they're not around! how you can be so sweet to me right now and be so bitter the next? why? please explain to me why!! give me a reason to keep hanging on with what we have. it's too much for me to take already. it's too hard, very, very hard. i can't even concentrate. i feel lost when you don't talk to me. i feel jealous when you're with girl 1 and when girl 2 flirts with you. what am i supposed to do? i wish one day you'd tell me that you do not want to go on with this. just tell me, please just do so. i'll understand. hindi ko naman pagpipilitan ang sarili ko sa taong may ayaw sa akin. hindi naman siguro ako ganyan ka tanga diba? at alam mo yun! alam yung mga bagay-bagay na nangyari sa akin apat na taon na ang lumipas. alam mo din naman diba? alam mo hindi ako yung tipong pinagsisiksikan ang sarili sa mga may ayaw sa akin. kaya sabihin mo na. sabihin mo na sa akin na wala na, na hindi na tayo maaring maging magkaibigan at mas lalaong hindi hihigit doon. kung pwede sana sa mas lalong madaling panahon. para maaga pa lang nagsisimula na akong tapusin itong katangahang pinanggagagawa ko sa buhay kong miserable na wala ka.

i can't remember the last time i could live life without you by my side. i always miss you, seeing you and being with you. it's so hard and so weird that you're only so sweet to meet when we're talking on the phone or texting or chatting. but other than that it's just not the same. i don't know why you're slowly drifting away when there are people away. like i'm a complete stranger to you. i just wish, i just hope you'd tell me what's wrong and what's bothering you. 

1) stop thinking about that person

2) avoid that person every way possible

3) stop looking at the places you know that person usually is

4) stop looking at the direction that person is at

5) stop texting, chatting and listening to that person's voice. the way that person sings randomly and how that person's voice just captivates every part of your body.

i have 10 reasons why i prefer blogging in lj than anywhere else.

10) lj>multiply
9) lj>facebook
8) i get to save my unsaved blogs
7) not alot of people use lj
6) i have around less than 10 friends who are using lj
5) i get to make some blogs viewable for me only
4) i know we're not friends
3) but somehow i also know
2) i can't keep most of my posts private
1) just so you can read it :">

it's so hard for me to keep avoiding you. to keep backing away from the feelings i feel when you're right beside me. or the random chats and text messages you'd send me. how do you expect me to forget about you like that when all the things you say are too heart warming. all the things you say, all the things you do. all of these just make me fall more for you:)

i started my day with swiss miss marshmallow lovers@-) hahaha! then i left for school and helped in packing for the relief goods. i had so much fun but i'm really tired already. i want to sleep but i can't sleep. ooohhh thanks to the peepz i was with the whole day. i'll name all, i hope i won't miss anyone:| thanks to joan, elizha, nich, cam, car, kyla, anna, nikki pay, missy, patring, lyka and lyka's sister, bea f. I REALLY HOPE I DID NOT MISS ANYONE:| it was so fun to go aroun the shops in galle with elizha to ask for boxes. kasi naubusan ng paglalagyan ng mga goods:| people were staring at us pa kasi we were store hopping and paglabas namin ni elizha sa esprit we had boxes. then we went to topshop and we were able to get boxes:)) it was super tiring but REALLY fun! sakit na ng arms ko from carrying stuff! di kasi ako batak mej lang. we ate lunch in tboy, went back to school then left for galle again. i got dq with kaye and aj got rocky road from jollibee(mas masarap ice cream ng mcdo!). we went to best sellers then sat sa may floor somewhere there:)) and aj kept playing the "say stop" game:| AMP!  oh i saw air force people in poveda kanina! it was so funny:))


It's sad that i only realized now that i have not been writing for a VERY LONG time. i miss the times when i'm so inspired to just write a poem kahit in filipino lang wala talaga!!~X( It's so frustrating. For some weird reasons i''m losing my source of inspiration. i don't even know why. but maybe it's because I have been very busy tto even find an inspiration :-< i'll try writing soon:) but i do have four lines na:> shucks!=))

your bitter sweet words
your random songs i've heard
the certain look upon your eyes
make me believe there are no lies

i'll edit soon:)) ang bored ko na=))